When you know what you must do, but don’t do it, there are several possible reasons.
You are afraid. (It’s physically intimidating, or just a step too big out of your comfort zone.)
It’s risky. (You might get injured, ridiculed, lose money.)
You don’t believe you can succeed, or that the thing you must do will work for you (even if it works for others).
So you dig in — say no — and stay in your comfort zone, even if it’s clearly uncomfortable.
Any time we decide to change (a habit, a thought pattern, the way we speak, how we spend our money), RESISTANCE rears up.
We are creatures of comfort.
We don’t like being shaken out of our way of living and being, even if all the evidence is saying we need to change.
Having resisted change at various points in my life, I have learned that the best way to overcome resistance is to TAKE ACTION.
Or as Susan Jeffers says: Feel the fear and do it anyway.
It’s easier said than done.
When I’m at the dojo and the instructor asks me to do something physically challenging, my first instinct is to back away in trepidation. Someone else can go first. I’ll watch, because my mind needs time to process what I’m being asked to do.
At the root of my reluctance is a fear of injury.
Who will do the school drop-off and pick-up if I can’t drive?
Who will look after the kids and the house?
How will I run my coaching practice?
And beneath the fear of injury is a lack of TRUST.
I don’t trust that my body will know the right thing to do. (I’m too clumsy, uncoordinated, too old.)
I don’t trust that my partner will support me correctly. (What if they let go of me when I’m not ready?)
I don’t trust that if this doesn’t work out, it’s not the end of the world. (I will also learn something useful. And if I do succeed, imagine how empowered I will feel!)
As an introvert, I have a tendency to overthink everything.
I am learning that we often intuitively know the right thing to do, but are afraid to listen to our intuition.
We feel safe (and clever!) when we can reason things out and persuade ourselves and others why we should or shouldn’t act in a particular way.
But we are more than creatures of logic. We are also emotional, intuitive, and spiritual, connected to the Divine in a powerful way because we are after all made in God’s image.
Resistance comes from Ego (“Edging God Out”, as I heard someone once say) — wanting to be in control, wanting certainty, wanting a guarantee of safety and success before stepping out.
The opposite – Trust, Faith, Surrender, Flow – comes from the heart.
Different approaches. Different results.
Next time you feel resistance to a new idea or a challenging activity, acknowledge that it’s coming from your ego (which is trying to keep you safe), and then do the thing that is hard to do.
Keep practising letting your Trust exceed your Fear.
There is no shortcut, and it may take a lifetime, but you will grow as a person if you stick to it.